True Happiness
by Sir Chronos
Summary: Is True Happiness really a fairytale, or is Hachiman's craving for the 'Genuine thing' going to lead him there?
1. Chapter 1

**Note: This chapter got a major makeover all thanks to Sonochu. The 'OOC' scene in the clubroom was removed and a lot of changes were made.**

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 **Chapter 1: Confession**

 _"I love you!"_

Love, a word normally used to describe someone's attraction towards another. A word I never expected to be uttered towards me. Some might consider that too pessimistic for a teenager such as myself to say, but my history with my peers had never been great. In fact, it was quite the opposite. No, I only planned to marry to fulfill my status as a househusband and nothing more.

It all started when Yukinoshita left the clubroom to deliver a report on the amount of requests our club had received to sensei. The report was nothing special really, and it even gave me some time to kick back and relax. Of course Yuigahama was still here and I'd have to entertain her. She was known to be very talkative; at least in terms of Yukinoshita and I. Still, that wasn't much of a problem for one such as myself. That was until her confession.

Now she didn't just say 'I love you' right out of the blew. No, instead she went into a long spiel about how much I meant to her and how I opened up her eyes to the world around her. Apparently she found some good in my pessimism. It only took one look at her firm eyes to know that she meant every word of it.

My immediate response was to turn away from her and stare at the floor. I couldn't deal with this? How did I not see this coming anyway? There were signs. Of course there were signs. Her incessant need to include me in her activities, the redness in her cheeks whenever she would talk to me alone, and how could I forget the night we watched the fireworks show. Those all gave the impression that she could have had some romantic feelings for me. I firmly denied that conclusion though. She was a nice girl after all, so it was in her nature to be friendly and acclimating towards everyone.

It was one of the few times my pragmatic cynicism failed me. If this were a year ago, around the time we first met, I probably would've said yes. She was a very pretty girl with her hair dyed pink and brown eyes; I can't deny that I didn't have some feelings for her back when we first met. Sadly, it only took me a few months to realize that our personalities clashed too much. Her eccentric personality didn't mix well with my cynical sarcasm. If I said yes, we might be happy for a few weeks, but eventually our differing personalities would create conflict, causing both our relationship and friendship to fall apart. It wouldn't stop until it affected my friendship with Yukinoshita and possibly even everything I've worked so hard to acquire.

I didn't know what to do. Normally if I came across a situation I couldn't handle, I just ignored it and moved on. A loner was more like a nomad than anything else, not caring for the relationships that were harmed from their decisions. That would negatively affect Yuigahama though, and I actually care about her. My only other option is to reject her gently. Gah, I've never been good at subtlety!

I mustered up all the courage I had in me before finally turning around and answering her. "I..I'm sorry, Yuigahama; I don't feel the same way." It was said so fast that I barely understood it myself.

Based on her crumpled face though, she definitely understood. She tried to flash me a smile in an effort to hide her emotions, but it was convincing no one. "Somehow, Hikki, I knew you'd say something like that. Still, I had to say something; I just –" her voice broke suddenly and she let out a sob that even surprised herself. After a few attempts, she was able to speak again. "Good luck finding something genuine, Hikki." She was already out the door before I could utter a reply.

Did...did that mean she was done with me? Shit. Why didn't I handle that better? Ugh, I'm such a screw up! A part of me wanted to go after her, but I knew it would do neither of us any good. At least that's what I told myself.

My knees felt weak. Is this how Hayama feels when he rejects someone? He always seemed strong during a girl's confession. Was this another thing I failed to notice?

I must've spent more time than I thought in my own head after Yuigahama left, because the next thing I know the club room door flew open and Yukinoshita came storming in with the fiercest glare she has probably given anyone in her entire life.

"What did you do to make Yuigahama run into the bathroom crying?" She asked, giving me a wary look. "You didn't try anything perverted when you two were alone, did you? You may look untrustworthy with you dead eyes, but even I expected more from you."

It was sad that I couldn't tell if she was joking or not. "I don't want to talk about it," I said before sighing, "Instead of talking to me, you should go comfort Yuigahama in the bathroom."

Yukinonshita looked like she wanted to say something, only to decide otherwise and leave the room after Yuigahama with a flick of her hair.

Why did she come to me first anyway? Did she just want to stop me from causing me any more harm? That would mean that she saw me as some fledgling criminal then. It also wouldn't explain why she was trying to tease me, if she even was doing that. Could she have been trying to knock me down a peg to avenge Yuigahama? That's impossible, she had a lot harsher means to do that at her disposal.

In any case it doesn't matter; I'm alone once again. Somehow I figured things would end up like this. Perhaps it was stupid of me to desire something genuine. For me, the solitary state I'm in is genuine. It will always be a part of me. At least I'll always have my sister.

Tears started forming around my eyes before I even knew it. Yes, just like the time after I gave a confession of my own back in middle school, I began crying. My emotions just wouldn't stay pent up inside me anymore. I guess there is one advantage to be alone; no one can hear you cry.

It probably took me about half an hour before I could regain control of my emotions. By that time the clock was already at the time Yukinoshita would normally disband the club. I might as well head home then.

As expected my bike was the only one remaining on the bike rack when I got there. What wasn't expected was Yukinoshita waiting for me.

"I'm surprised your still here," she said, running her hand through her long, dark hair, "Are you lurking around here in hopes of preying on some other innocent girls to violate?"

"Just give it a rest; I'm not in the mood." I muttered back. Why are you still here anyway?"

While she tried to keep her expression indifferent, it wasn't hard to tell that she was angry with me. "Yuigahama wanted me to walk her home so I obliged. We live in opposite directions so I had to pass by the school again to go back to my house."

"Oh." Her explanation seemed weak to me. Why didn't she just get her family's limo to pick them up? Wouldn't that have been easier then walking across the city? I had no desire to argue with her though so I let the topic drop. "What do you want with me then?"

"I'm walking you home." She said her it so confidently, as if she knew I would say yes. Maybe it was more adequate to say she was determined to follow me even if I said no.

"I can get home just fine. Besides, shouldn't you go home before your family gets upset?"

Perhaps it was low to use her awkward relationship with her family to get her off my back, but I didn't want her company when she was just going to blame me for Yuigahama, even if it was all my fault.

She frowned before replying, "My time will be better spent making sure you don't attack any other innocent girls."

"I'm not some sort of sexual deviant." Still, I decided, there was no getting out of this. I started walking with my now unlocked bike to the side of me, not bothering to make sure Yukinoshita was following along.

"Yuigahama asked you out, didn't she?" Yukinoshita asked, falling in step right behind me.

She was more perceptive than I gave her credit for. "None of your business. How'd you even know that anyway?" Crap, I just gave it away.

"She told me."

Oh, of course.

"Why did you say no? While I can't begin to fathom the creepy thoughts inside your head, Yuigahama is an attractive girl."

"Love is dumb." I avoided the question. It was obvious I was doing it. There was no doubt Yukinoshita knew this too.

"Maybe for a rotten mind like yours."

Is this where she comes out as a secret lover of all things romance? Nah, that would only happen in a romantic comedy.

"It's just fact. One in four marriages here end in divorce. Numerous more only stick together for financial reasons. That's not even getting into the rate of domestic abuse here."

"Then what of your goal of becoming a househusband? Seems pretty hard without a wife."

"Who said I can't still get married? I'll just make a contract with her beforehand. This way neither of us end up fooling ourselves into falling in love with the other. Basically, I'll only be her servant and nothing more." Now that I said it all out loud, it sounded depressing.

Yukinoshita paused as if to come up with the right words. "Then you must have accepted the idea of living an unfulfilling life." She said it so indifferently that it almost seemed like she did care. It didn't make the words sting any less though.

No, I am Hikigaya Hachiman, a loner. I even mastered the 108 special techniques so I can remain safe in my loneliness. Besides, I tried escaping the inevitable in middle school and was only ridiculed and bullied for my efforts. It goes to show I'm only suitable as a househusband.

Once again she looked like she wanted to say something but choose not to. This behavior was so unlike her. Usually she would be extremely blunt about everything, showing little tact even when she should.This behavior was beginning to irritate me though. We were friends, even if she didn't use those exact words, and yet here she was not giving her honest opinion. It was like she was pitying me.

I'm not something to stare at and feel sorry for. I want this.

She'll take Yuigahama's side anyway when this finally comes to blows, so I have no idea why I'm deluding myself into believing that she'll still accept me in the end. Her relationship with Yuigahama has always been stronger than her relationship with me.

Yukinoshita, the ice queen that she was, must've seen my inner turmoil because she starting smiling sadly, as if to say she was superior to me in some way. Just because she had the highest grades in the class and had more of a handle on social situations like this, she thinks she's better than me? That bitch.

Bitch? I really am reverting back to my old self, aren't I? In fact, it would be better to say it never left. This thought process distracted me long enough for me to not voice my aggravation with Yukinoshita. It didn't mean I was any less annoyed with her.

After a few more minutes of walking in silence, my house came into view. Good, I didn't know how much more of this façade I could take. I gave my obligatory farewells and continued heading for my house, fully believing our talk was over. Apparently Yukinshita wasn't finished yet.

"Hikigaya, if you don't provide the minimal effort to find what you want, then you have no right to be jealous of the people who actually found what they're looking for through the effort they gave. The Service club can't help you with your request until you understand that."

My response was to slam the door on her face. Shows what she knows about me. I have been trying to better myself since joining the club. This only proves that it didn't work.

Without even realizing what I was doing, I slowly leaned on the door and fell to the ground before letting out a sigh. This was all my fault, and because of it, I may have screwed up my chances of ever finding the genuine thing I was after.

Somehow the silence surrounding me was the most damning thing I ever heard.

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 **Thank you for reading this and for all the reviews. I started writing this just as a way to pass some time but from now on I'll be taking this a bit more seriously.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Note: For people who previously read the chapter 1 (before 25 june), the chapter got changed dramatically, please check it out.**

 **New note: This chapter has gone through some minor grammer and formatting changes.**

 **Oh and thank you for 1.5k views :)**

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 **Chapter 2 : Hikigaya Hachiman runs away from the problem, again.**

Huh, where an I? This looks like a dark cave...

I turn around hearing someone weep and see three girls, one crying and the other two consoling her.

"You are so cruel, Hikki!"

It was Yuigahama who was crying bitterly. Behind her Yukinoshita was looking at me in disgust and Isshiki wouldn't even meet my eye.

"Senpai, you are a heartless monster!"

"Hikigaya-kun..."

Stop it! I just did what I thought was right and I don't regret it.

"Do you?", That voice; it's so similar to my own.

I turned around to see, myself? There is no doubt, those eyes and that slouch, it is me, but that's impossible!

"Who are you?"

"You could call me you consciousness or simply the 'voice in your head," okay that's creepy,"You still didn't answer my question, do you or not regret your decision?"

I could just say yes and get whatever this is over with but, I just can't, though I really don't regret it...

...or do I?

* * *

"Wake up oni-chan, or else you'll be late for school!"

That was just a dream? Funny I never saw nor remembered one so vividly.

I wake up finding my ears ringing and see Komachi beside me, standing cheerfully like she always does.

"Oi don't just shout at my ears!"

"Bad Oni-chan, I woke you up just so you won't be late to school, you just lot a lot of points."

You just made Komachi angry, just one more thing for you to brood on.

"Is something bothering you Oni-chan?", somehow Komachi knew something was troubling me, guess our sibling senses are still very strong.

"Yea, and I really don't want to go to school because of that..."

"And will that solve the problem?" I don't get where she's going with this...

"Uh, no?"

Hearing that she made a face that I thought she could never show, she showed anger and...annoyance?

"Then why don't you want to go, you are a really strong person who thinks logically, what happened to you?"

"Komachi, I don't like it when you imitate me."

"But I like you when you are acting like yourself, and that's not what you are right now, my Oni-chan is someone who faces his problems and tries to solve them, he isn't one to run away. Always remember that 'kay? That line gave me a ton of Komachi points!"

God, you're so cute! What she said does lift my spirit up a bit, but as they say facing this is easier said than done.

* * *

"Bye Komachi!"

It is still quite chilly out. Now what I first need to think about is how I'm going to confront Yuigahama. I need to make sure she's okay and that our friendship is going to stay intact. Though I never realized this until now, yesterday's events are going to seriously affect Yukinoshita, though she won't make it obvious, I'm sure.

"Hikio?" huh, please don't be Miura, I don't think I can hold up against you in the morning, at least in the state I am in right now.

"Yo", I replied, now please go away.

Miura isn't having any of it though. "Is that how you reply to someone? Where are your manners, Hikio."

"Yes, that is my way of speaking and the fact that I replied itself is a big thing..."

"I wanted to ask you about Yuigahama. She wasn't acting like herself when I called yesterday."

Dammit, I don't want to talk about this. Couldn't you have a better timing? Eureka! Why didn't I think of this before?

"Oh, I just remembered I need to submit something to Yukinoshita! Catch you later!" I quickly jumped on my bicycle and rode away.

I need to be really careful, the last time I went this fast, I ended up in the hospital for a month.

Okay, now let's just check my (imaginary) to-do list, 1) Don't be late and end up getting KO'ed by Hiratsuka Sensei, 2) Do something about Yuigahama, 3) Apologize to Yukinoshita for yesterday.

I just have 5 minutes left; I need to hurry up now.

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"Oh you made in on time, Hikigaya-kun." Hiratsuka Sensei greeted as I walked through the classroom door.

"Uh, is that a bad thing?"

"No, but I'm disappointed, I watched some action anime yesterday and wanted to try out a new move I saw on you."

Scary, someone please marry her soon!

Anyway a thing on my list is done, now to think about the others. Apologizing to Yukinoshita is easy, all I have to do is admit that I have zombie eyes or that I'm just an idiot or something, and that'll do it, I guess. But Yuigahama...

I sat on my seat, trying to concentrate on the class but nothing got into my head.

Time was whizzing ahead at breakneck speed and as they say, time is relative and seems to move quickly when you are doing something you like, and right now I'm in a state where I have complete peace, I'm alone.

And before I knew it, it's lunch. I turn around to see Hayama's group, chatting away like they always do. My eye catches Yuigahama and I can clearly say that she is hurt.

"Hayama," Miura says, bringing my attention to her,"There's this new ice cream shop down the street, shall we go there today?"

"I have football practice but if everyone wants to go then I'll find the time to come," and then Hayama gives his signature fake smile.

"I'm totally going for it, Hayato-kun!" Tobe shouts and then Ooka and that other guy in that trio nods too.

"I'll definitely come, why'd I miss some Hayama x Tobe, they'd be so close and touching each other and.. and," Miura puts a handkerchief just in time to stop a big squirt of nose bleed.

Then somehow, everyone gets quiet and looks in the direction of Yuigahama. Guess seeing the usual chatty, cheerful girl, silent was really weird. Everyone has a shocked expression on their faces and Miura was slightly frowning.

Noticing their stare Yuigahama nervously laughs and tries to diffuse the situation by trying to say something in her 'happy' tone again. Nobody notices anything wrong with her except Miura. After that their usual chatting went on with her half heartedly listening to it.

Looking at them makes me think, excluding Yuigahama for now, why the heck do they always seem so happy?

It must be their naive and simple thinking, never worrying about the future or anything, as if they want to enjoy this ride called life, whereas I'm always worrying about what's coming next or expecting it (the 'ride') to come crashing down.

Will I ever find true happiness with my rotten way of thinking?

Just then Yuigahama's eyes meet mine, and I realized that I've been staring at her unconsciously. Her eyes slightly turn moist, and I turn away really quick to stop making this situation any worse, though I wanted to clear this awkwardness I don't how to since I never was in this situation before.

Guess going to the club before her and asking Yukinoshita assistance would be right, and of course I still have to apologize.

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I..need..to go faster!

You might ask me why I was running in the corridor this fast, well I needed to get as much time as possible to prepare myself and I realized getting to the club fast would give me a bit more time.

After a while of intense exercise, I made it to the clubroom.

What the, I expect it to be empty but there sat a girl with long raven black hair, reading a book peacefully like she always does. Though how she got here so quickly is totally beyond me.

"Y...Yo," I said panting a bit.

"Hello, Hikigaya-kun."

"Uh Yukinoshita, about yesterday I.."

"Don't worry about that." huh, I expected a few insults or some book throws or something that conveyed her anger at me, wait a second did some parasitic alien infest you?

"Perhaps I never expected manners and gratitude from an unruly dog such as yourself." Never mind, there's the insult I've been waiting for.

The heck?! Waiting? When did I become such a Masochist?

Now getting down to business,"I need some quick advice right now, what should I say to Yuigahama?"

"You don't need to worry about that one too, atleast for now. Yuigahama-san is not going to attend the club activities for a while. Instead of rushing the 'apology', I suggest you think this through, considering the fact that you have a lot of time."

"I see," I felt totally relived now that the burden of apologizing is out of my shoulders. Then suddenly, a thought occurs to me.

"Wait a second, why should I even apologize? She was the one who confessed and threw me into a state of temporary depression, if anyone should be apologizing, it would be her!"

I realized how cruel of me it was to speak those words after they were spoken, and Yukinoshita was seriously angry with them.

"I know that you are dense and insensitive but I didn't think you are that heartless to leave her in the state she is in. She is after all your first real friend and assuring her that you both still are is the least you could do. Yuigahama is such a nice girl that dared call an ungrateful stray like you a friend, and..and," Yukinoshita was swelling up with tears now, and so was I.

Why?! Why am I the way that I am, I don't want to be like this anymore, but I just don't seem to change.

Silence fell between us for a short while. "I'm sorry, Yukinoshita. I made up my mind, and in this situation I am right now with you. Asking for help wouldn't be right of me, but please somehow make Yuigahama come to the clubroom at lunch after she calms down a little. I intend on clearing things up."

Hearing that, Yukinoshita's face showed genuine confusion. Now that I think about it, wasn't I acting all cold just a while ago? Why was I saying things like this just after that? Guess even I'm not sure who I am anymore.

But the next few words that I want to speak are a lot harder to say. "And... I promise that I will put in some effort to change myself," saying that, I gave a slight smile, trying not to make it creepy, and fortunately she seemed to be satisfied with that and gave me one in return.

The sky turned orange and the clock turned 5, signalling the end of clubroom.

* * *

I got my bike from the bike stand and start walking towards the gate and I find Yukinoshita.

"Um can I walk you home?"

"Huh, isn't that how rapists start the conversation and follow a beautiful girl home, should I keep 911 on the speed dial Hikigaya-kun?"

"Please don't misunderstand, I don't want to feel like I owe you for yesterday that's all."

"I see, well I don't mind, but please remember, the police are just a tap away."

Silence is another state in which I feel calm and peaceful. But I don't know why when in presence of her, the same silence also becomes comforting.

After a few minutes of walking, we were at her apartment.

"Bye," I said awkwardly waving my hand. Farewells (and Greetings) were never my strong points because I consider them useless. Why say 'goodbye' when you know that you are going to see them again? Unless the person is on verge of death, I don't see the use of farewells. The only reason I even said 'bye' now was just for courtesy.

"Goodbye, Hikigaya-kun, see you tomorrow." see, she herself is saying 'see you tomorrow', then why say goodbye in the first place? Guess this world really is nonsensical and stupid, including you, no offence Yukinoshita.

The walk back home was totally dull and boring. But now I'm sure...

'I no longer regret my decision', I said to myself.

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 **So Guys, sorry for the delay in updating. I had school work and recently my cousins came to visit after 2 years so I couldn't concentrate on writing this but I finally completed it. I will make changes if I find any mistakes. I can't promise anything but I'll try to complete the next chapter sooner.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A shoutout to Aqua-sama and some others who think that 8man was OOC in the previous chapter, it's probably because most of the people who got into Oregairu have only seen the anime. The anime was just made to boost the sales of the LN and contains like only 10% of the content. Character development wasn't too deep or obvious in the anime with just a bit of change in the way of thinking happened while in the LN, 8man's thoughts and behavior was almost like how I wrote the chapter 2 (though I agree, I rushed the change a bit).This fic is basically my take on the volume 12 (the upcoming and perhaps the last LN volume) and hence a lot of change in character is gonna take place, simply put this fic might be a bit more OOC in the coming time.**

 **And to the guest who thinks this was just crap and stuff (I also presume you're the guy who gave the same kind of review for chap 1), Please keep in mind that this is my first attempt at a fanfic or writing itself in general and I'm still learning. So instead of being a lazy dickhead, please state the reason why you think this was 'Kinda stupid'. Heck just stop reading, I don't want to burden you by making you read something you hate so much.**

 **Because of people like you who don't know how hard it is to write a fic and do nothing but** **criticize others, a good writer (gnt00q) left writing fanfics.**

 **EDIT : I don't know why but what IamZero said hit me really hard. Making excuses is a thing I'm good at, and for the record, the above reply was written really long time ago when gnt00q's 'retirement' news was kinda fresh so I wrote it in the heat of the moment (shit, I made an excuse again). So first of all, sorry for the stuff I wrote above. But about 'dissing' non-writers, I never intended to offend anyone and that comment which I gave was targeted to those who don't know the pain of satisfyingly every reader or something. This in my opinion is a very debatable topic and given the chance, you and I, Zero, might be arguing about this for a long time. Then again sorry for the other stuff put up there and I'll definitely iqnore things like that in the future :(**

 **Putting that aside, lets get on with the story:-**

* * *

Could this day get even worse? A brain-splitting headache, an accident on the cycle resulting in an injured knee, and now getting humiliated by a teacher in front of the whole class, losing the small bit of dignity I had left. Just my luck.

I stood, staring at the function I have no idea how to solve. I can make out lines and shit, but I'm completely clueless here. I continued to stare at the equation; seemingly lacking the coordinates, or so that's what I got from my dug up pseudo-knowledge.

"How much of an idiot are you?" a voice stated.

Our usual Mathematics teacher got sick, and, as a substitute, we got this new, grumpy one who is quite new to teaching, according to Hiratsuka-sensei, that is. I'm guessing things didn't work out for him and now he's taking out his anger and frustration on me by giving the hardest problem I've ever seen. That, or I really am horrible in this subject. Hey, I never said I was good at it!

Wait, even our class-top Hayama looked confused, how the fuck am I supposed to do this, then?

"Are you dumb too? Answer me, boy!" He gruffly exclaims. Calm down, Hachiman. This guy is just being a sore loser.

"No, sensei. I don't get this problem…" I say in the politest way I could manage, suppressing the urge to talk back.

Before retorting, he gave out a chuckle that practically screamed: You suck.

"I knew it. Does anyone know how to solve this?" He asked. As a response, everyone tilted their heads to the ground. I swear I could see his face reddening out of anger and smoke coming out of his head.

"Dimwits, all of you! You can't even hope to…" He continued to heatedly speak about our incompetence. Honestly, I think I'm not in my classroom, but rather in his consciousness right now.

My brain went to standby mode, and everything became a blur. After what seemed like all eternity, the bell rung, signaling the end of this period, and the arrival of lunch.

As usual, I sit quietly in my seat eating lunch, doing my hobby of watching and eavesdropping others; mostly Hayama's clique and that's when I realize Yuigahama was absent today. Wow, guess I was too engrossed in my thought to notice her absence.

It was also a shame that it was wet outside.

"That math period was a total disaster, ya'know!?" I hear Tobe exclaim. Tobe, do you even know how to speak normal Japanese?

"Well, the problems he gave were quite hard." Hayama replies. Oh? Getting a little humble, I see. Although I'm not really sure if you were telling the truth or not. Really.

"If they're hard for you, then it must be impossible for us!" Yama-something frantically says.

"It's nothing like that. I bet even you can get them if you practice a bit." The prince said with his usual million-watt smile. Argh, I'll never understand why these people have such stupid, meaningless conversations on something trivial like mathematics.

Wait a second. Mathematics... studies... I think I'm forgetting something.

That's it. I forgot that I have a huge science report that's due on Monday! Dammit, I'm weak in that subject. I need some help. Let's check my options:

1) 'Almost' school topper Hayama. No way in hell. I don't think I could do that.

2) The science teacher himself? Nah, he's still pissed at my previous report.

Now the only one left is… Yukino Yukinoshita.

She's 'the' best when it comes to studies, and all she does in the clubroom is read a classic/boring book, so why not bug her a bit today?

* * *

"What do you mean by 'I didn't start working on it yet'? How lazy can you be to start working on a report literally 2 days from the date of submission?" The ever-so-cold ice queen claims and I'm sure she was quite happy to say/insult me aloud. That reaction was expected; hence I have come prepared!

"You see, Yukinoshita, the sheer amount of work scared me. I'm but a peasant treading the fields of science, and shouldn't a righteous angel such as yourself guide this poor soul?" Wow, those acting skills! Why didn't you get an Oscar yet, Hachiman?

Instead of the look of enlightenment I expected, I was given yet another scorning mien. She crosses her arms, a bulge surprisingly appearing, and prepares to speak. I know what this means. Defenses: Maximum.

"First of all, flattery won't get you anywhere. Second, they gave us almost a month to complete it, Hikigaya-kun." Dammit, she hit the spot.

"I know, but, even so, please help me on this!" I practically begged her. I'm desperate, for this is perhaps the last report that I have to submit. No science work ever again. So, sensei specifically told me to write a good one, or else, he'll rat me on to Hiratsuka-sensei. How'd he know I'm (kind of) scared of her anyways? Is he stalking me?

As I was stuck in my own thoughts, I was brought out of my trance by a sigh.

"I guess I do have to help you; being the president of the Service Club. The report is too big to write right now. Therefore, I suggest you gather information today, and perhaps you could come to my house tomorrow and I'll help you with it."

...really? From being ignored and treated like scum, to being commanded and now being invited to her house. That's some hardcore manipulation, Yukinoshita; at least that's what I'd like to think.

As they say, lazy people are geniuses. I just thought of an awesome idea.

"Wait a second, Yukinoshita. Did you complete your report?" I ask with a small grin on my face.

"Yes, I did. Unlike you, I completed it soon after it was given." She answers, and that's exactly what I want to hear!

"So, wouldn't it be easier if you just gave yours to me and I just copy it down, make a few changes to look unique and just submit it?"

The second time today, my expectations were wrong.

Hearing this, Yukinoshita shakes her head disapprovingly.

"It is the motto of the Service Club to teach someone to do something rather than to do the work for him." Ah, she used the 'motto card', which implies that I could either listen to her, or face my teacher's wrath.

'But to work is to lose, Hachiman. What about your noble principles?' You sure aren't making this easy, voice-in-my-head guy.

"Well, I don't seem to have a choice." I don't think I can take another hit from Hiratsuka-sensei. There goes my Sunday...

"I'll send you the details of when to come. Maybe tonight."

"And how are you going to do that? You don't have my number, Forgetfulshita-san." I cheekily retort.

"Then hand me your phone. I'll add it."

No way. If your icy, cold number gets added, then Totsuka's number will start shivering!

I took the phone out, still thinking of whether to give her my number or not. Yukinoshita visibly gets annoyed, and yanks the phone out of my hand. After typing her number, she gives it a ring and voila, now I have her number. Wait a second, now I could use it to prank call her through some phone booth!

"Hikigaya-kun, please keep in mind that if you make any prank calls, I'll put a harassment case on you." Eh? How'd you read my mind? Are you a psychic or something?

"Oh, I almost forgot. Do you know why Yuigahama was absent today?" I let out the question that's been bugging me for a while. Oi, I'm not obsessed with her or anything, she is my friend and I'm just ensuring if she was fine.

"Yes, she sent me a text saying that since faraway relative of her died." She somberly replies. Dammit, another thing for her to endure.

"Don't worry. When I asked her about her well-being, she said that she didn't even know the person who died, so I don't think it would affect her that much." Well, that's good enough for now, but, knowing her, I think she'll be sad even if she sees some random, stray dog get hurt.

In the corner of my eye, seeing the clock, I notice that it's almost five in the afternoon.

"It's getting late. I need to do some research on that report, anyway."

"See you tomorrow, then. I have a bit of work with Hiratsuka-sensei, so you go on." She replied.

* * *

"Onii-chan, you just got a text from Yukino-san! What does this mean!? Did you finally start dating her?!" I hear Komachi exclaim as she squeals like a banshee.

Oh shit, I think I forgot my phone in the kitchen when I went there to get a drink!

I check and just like before, I predicted what she would say:

 **Sender: Yukino Yukinoshita**

 **Subject: Details on when to visit**

 **Hikigaya-kun, you can come to my apartment at about 10 or 11 o'clock, but please don't take this as an opening of some sort. I fear very much for my chastity, and will not hesitate to call the police if you do anything suspicious. Remember, the number is at speed dial.**

I swear I felt her smirk being emitted from this message.

Do I really look that shady? I know that she was joking about it, but as they say, jokes are half meant.

Putting that aside, I think I really need to look into the topic, for if I just walk into her house without even knowing a bit about the report, begging for her help in every damn thing, she might literally kick me out for my stupidity.

...

Phew, my brain is literally fried with all that hard work put into that troublesome work. Wait, wasn't that redundant?

Time to jump onto my bed and escape into the land of dreams!

Though, seriously, I don't want to see any nightmares related to Yuigahama, today's grumpy teacher, or about Yukinoshita killing me tomorrow. Don't people get dreams about what they think before going to sleep? The hell, I should just stop thinking and start snoring already!

* * *

"WAKE UP ONI-CHAN!", and who wouldn't wake up with that? I mean if recorded that would be the best selling alarm tone for all corporate slaves!

"Oi Komachi, what did I tell you about shouting in my ears huh? And isn't it Sunday today, let me sleep a but more..."

"No way! This could be your only chance not to end up as a 50 year old virgin, so I'm not going to take any chances you know? Hah that gave me a lot of Komachi-points!" Hey, though the fact that you are considerate makes me happy, wasn't that a bit rude.

"I told you before, I'm going there just to complete my report and nothing else, please stop fantasizing about things like this, its still 7 Am and I need to get there at something like 11, so even if I start from our house at 10:30, I'll still make it on time."

"Aww you're no fun Oni-chan," Hachiman, you really need to choose your words more carefully, Komachi's upset, now what would make her happy again?

"Ok, how about this, if you let me sleep another hour, I'll let you choose my clothes today," Hachiman they should make you the minister of external affairs, and there would definitely be world peace!

...

'I know you're a Princess and I'm just a stable-boy, but...' **1**

"It's 8:30 now, wake up!" and so I wake up finding my cute little sister with some clothes clutched in her hands.

"And don't worry about a thing Oni-chan, the clothes I chose will definitely make Yukino-chan fall head over heels for you."

What the, these clothes are totally disgusting and stupid, or in other words according to normal people, are in 'fashion', but I will endure this for you Komachi! That line surely gave me a lot of points.

And then I quickly complete my breakfast and glance at the clock, it's still just 9:12, no need to worry about being late.

Argh, this its going to be a long day!

* * *

 **1** _a reference from 'Monsters University'_

 **Guess this chapter got updated pretty quickly (atleast compared to the previous ones), and funnily enough, whoever gives me a lot of criticism in reviews (the constructive type, mind you), is ending up as another unofficial beta reader to the story, first Sonochu and now Aqua-sama. Anyway thanks to them for giving some light touches and making this chapter better!**

 **Oh and I'll update this chap if I find any mistakes :3**

 **And if possible follow/fav/review!**


	4. Note

**Hey guys, I just wanted to say something (no I'm not quitting). I just remembered that someone gave an 'idea' in a review of the fanfiction, Push Back, which I found very interesting and more or less easier to write than this fic, and I might've hit writer's block on this one too :P, so I might prioritize writing that one before this. I know that idea was given to author kitsuneLovers94, so it was like a suggestion, so I'll perhaps go ask him permission or something.**

 **It's going to be a AU in which Hayama and 8man go to the same middle school (not yaoi), where Hachiman still has eighth grade syndrome and was still bullied.**

 **I don't know about Japanese schooling and have many doubts (like, does eighth grade come under middle or high school, what kind of name should I put for their school and so on). I also might need to go through the LNs again for some info, and the chapters are going to be longer than this fic's, so posting it might take a long time.**

 **So, should I go forward with the idea or scrap it?**

Argh so much work to do *sigh*


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